Warming for the Chiffchaff
Nige, the man who knows about ornithology, though definitely no twitcher, saw a chiffchaff on Box Hill in Surrey yesterday. It turns out he was one of the first to spot the bird this year. This means spring has started. Global warming? Bring it on. Well, er, I didn't actually mean...
# posted by Bryan Appleyard : 11:49 AM
28 Comments:
At March 13, 2007 12:19 PM,
Edwina Currie said…
He's a cute little fucker, isn't he?
At March 13, 2007 12:24 PM,
Bryan Appleyard said…
Reminds me of John Major.
At March 13, 2007 12:26 PM,
Edwina said…
True. Very true.
At March 13, 2007 12:42 PM,
Bertie Aherne said…
What a lot of people don't realise is that the Chiffchaff overwinters in Ireland, not in Africa as previously thought. It's arrival on your shores has nothing to do with global warming and everything to do with the Cheltenham festival and St Patrick's day. 'Tis indeed the blarney bird.
At March 13, 2007 12:44 PM,
Bryan Appleyard said…
Why on earth would one overwinter in Ireland?
At March 13, 2007 1:04 PM,
CaptainB said…
Is that really Bertie and Edwina?
At March 13, 2007 1:35 PM,
Anonymous said…
Presumably, if you couldn't afford the air fare to go somewhere warmer?
Otis B Driftwood
At March 13, 2007 1:42 PM,
Edwina Currie said…
Fuck knows.
At March 13, 2007 2:49 PM,
Neil Forsyth said…
An extremely buoyant nest market and low capital grains tax in Ireland has made it a favourite destination for those who want a quick return on their nest egg. However, market analysts have still not twigged why the inscrutable Chiffchaff chooses to conduct its business during the winter months. They say it may have something to do with wormholes.
At March 13, 2007 3:20 PM,
Bryan Appleyard said…
I suspect not, CaptainB
At March 13, 2007 3:40 PM,
Anonymous said…
Aha, but is that really CaptainB and Otis?
At March 13, 2007 3:43 PM,
Bryan Appleyard said…
And is that really you, Anon? Hard to tell.
At March 13, 2007 3:48 PM,
Edwina Currie said…
This is one fucking confused cess-pit. How do I find my way to Jeffrey Bloody Archer for some straight-talking?
At March 13, 2007 3:59 PM,
Anonymous said…
Edwina, is there really any need for such language at this time of the day? It strikes me as entirely unnecessary for a lady such as yourself to eff and blind so.
Otis B Driftwood.
At March 13, 2007 4:22 PM,
Bertie Aherne said…
I had that Edwina Currie over to stay here a few years back. She told me all about her negotiations with the galloping major. I thought to myself that she was very forward-looking and I had half a mind to offer her a post in my cabinet, if you follow my drift. I suggested to her that she might like to help cement Anglo-Irish relations with me but she had a strange wistful look in her eyes which told me that then was not the time.
At March 13, 2007 4:43 PM,
Edwina Currie said…
Otis, the person you know as Edwina Currie is merely a simulacrum. I'm just an actress off the street hired to play a part. This politics is just television, and the equivalent of striking gold for us thespians- even better than getting Coronation Street as we get a bit more leeway to develop the character. That potato head "Bertie Aherne" is actually Welsh ffs.
At March 13, 2007 4:47 PM,
Bertie Aherne said…
Oh Edwina, you haven't changed a bit, have you!
At March 13, 2007 4:59 PM,
Anonymous said…
Bryan, I'm glad to hear that the potty mouth was merely an element of 'Edwina's' character. That sort of language from a dame is most offputting - certainly during daylight hours, anyway.
Otis BD
At March 13, 2007 5:26 PM,
Edwina Currie said…
Otis, the time of day is a complete mystery to me. I've been on a bender with Maureen Lipman for God knows how ......... long. This is a real struggle to rein myself in.
Just to add, Berie, you're still a crap actor. All you can do is the accent.
At March 13, 2007 5:28 PM,
Edwina said…
Everyone seems to have forgotten about the fucking chiffchaff, haven't they?
At March 13, 2007 5:52 PM,
Brit said…
That last comment by 'Edwina' raised a genuine belly-laugh. (But great comedians always know when to stop, remember...)
At March 13, 2007 6:12 PM,
Andrew said…
I think Edwina knows her time is up.
At March 13, 2007 7:19 PM,
Lee Madgwick said…
Bryan, is this now The Appleyard Forum?
Edwina, you'd make a great guest at my next dinner party! Do call...
At March 13, 2007 7:57 PM,
River of deceit said…
This winter hasn't even seemed like a winter. There was hardly any frost on the ground. Which is shite. I like winter.
At March 13, 2007 9:29 PM,
Bertie Aherne said…
We'll take Edwina off you in return for a host of golden chiffchaffs, winging their way towards you right now. In the morning, you will be blessed by their mournful call and we will still have the better deal. Edwina, your time in England may be up but your time in Ireland is just beginning.
At March 13, 2007 9:45 PM,
The Grocer said…
I'm not sure that this singing Chiff Chaff was "one of the first" as they are often found from early March in the South and they are singing up here in Northumberland now as well. Many Chiff Chaff's now winter in the UK and are therefore well placed to establish a territory and begin singing early.Now if it had been a Cuckoo....
At March 14, 2007 3:09 AM,
Edwina said…
That's all I need- a fucking invitation from the Micks.
At December 13, 2008 12:25 AM,
willpoy said…
This post has been removed by a blog administrator.
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